Recognizing His hand -

A week ago, Craig told me about his dinner. He was traveling to Upland (just a day trip) when he decided he was hungry. He felt like he needed rice and beans and wasn't familiar with the area and the available restaurants. 

He saw a Cafe Rio and happily went in to feed his craving. As he was going out, he noticed two sister missionaries. He thought, I should buy their dinner, but then dismissed the thought and went out to the car. He got the impression again, and went back into the restaurant and waited at the cash register so he could pay for their dinner. 

He told me that he later was taught that was the reason for his craving, and he was scared that he almost missed it. He almost missed helping the Lord take care of His missionaries.

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Saturday Craig, Josh and I went out to eat. We came home with leftovers, enough for Sunday dinner. I had already bought a roast, and wanted to cook it. No hanging on to a roast for Sunday dinner for a whole week. Sunday morning I saw I had left the pan I needed to cook the roast dirty in the sink. Icky, I know. I thought about just getting it ready to put in the dishwasher and leaving it at that. But I found myself washing the pan and getting the roast ready and delay starting the oven because I was going early for choir practise.

In Relief Society it was announced that the missionaries needed dinners, in fact they needed dinner that day. There I was sitting in church with a big roast in the oven. So I claimed the elders for dinner and sent Craig a text about what I had done and to tell the missionaries that they were coming to our house for dinner. (We had just had them for dinner on Tuesday.)

I got home before Craig, and got started on the potatoes and had the boys set the table. Because the roast was in the oven, the missionaries were eating at a non-standard time. I apologized to them when they came over, and they said it was perfect, they were fasting that day and the timing was great. I was  grateful that I had listened and put the roast in and had dinner for two fasting servants of the Lord. They decided to fast, knowing they didn't have dinner scheduled.

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After dinner Craig took them home. They had mentioned that they didn't have their phone. They thought it might have fallen out of their pocket in the car. So I didn't really worry about it. 

Craig came home and said they hadn't found the phone in the car. He turned on his flashlight and looked under the  recliners, and searched the couch and love seat. The missionaries called and he said he had looked and didn't find it. 

I had changed seats to get closer to the light so I could read my book. I looked at my old seat and said, I was sitting in that seat when you were looking. He had looked under the recliner, but now he searched the cushions. He waited for about a minute before he called them which was a bit weird, but when he called them, they told him that after the first phone call, using the phone of another companionship, they had been discouraged and had just knelt in prayer to ask for His help. As soon as they said amen, the phone rang and it was Craig. 

I felt bad that I had not gotten out of the seat and looked the first time, but Craig said I wasn't supposed to find it then. This was a faith building moment for His elders, and He was in charge of the timeline.

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I am humbled by these  moments of seeing His hand in our lives.

Faith to Move Forward

Faith requires action.

Sometimes that action is easy and logical.

This type of faith may be reading our scriptures everyday. Praying morning and night. Attending our meetings. Paying out tithing. Doing our visiting and home teaching faithfully.

In Alma 32:27-29, we can read about the experiment of planting the seed of faith. First we must clear a space and then plant the seed. We need to care for it and it will begin to grow. The growing of the seed would increase your faith.

The easy and logical actions that accompany faith will nourish the seedling and allow it to grow stronger and larger.

The Doctrine and Covenants say: ". . . as often as thou hast inquired thou hast received instruction of my Spirit." (6:14)

And further down in that section the Lord counsels Oliver on how to gain a further witness; ". . .if you desire a further witness, cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might know concerning the truth of these things. Did I not speak peace to your mind concerning the matter? What greater witness can you have than from God?" (22-23)

There is another kind of faith. A faith that requires us to act when it difficult and illogical.

There is a story in the Old Testament about a king. Hezekiah was the king of Judah. The Northern Kingdom had already fallen to the Assyrians and the Ten Tribes had been carried and lost to history. Hezekiah's entire kingdom, save the city of Jerusalem had already fallen to the invading Assyrian army. No other nation had ever survived an attack from this army. Hezekiah took his problem to the Lord, and He spoke peace to the soul of this king.

Part of the answer from the Lord was directed to the invading Assyrian king. The Lord tells him, "Because thy rage against me, and thy tumult, is come up into mine ears, therefore will I put my hook in thy nose, and my bridle in thy lips, and I will turn thee back by the way by which thou camest." (Isaiah 37:29)

The God of Hosts spoke and in the morning a good portion of the invading army was dead. The packed up and left. In essence returning Hezekiah's kingdom to him.

Another story about a difficult and illogical faith involves one of my favorite moments in the Old Testament. Elisha has been identified as a protector of Judah. An invading army targets him. Elisha's servant sees the surround army and is afraid. Elisha sees this fear and comforts him.

"Fear not, for they that be with us are more than they that be with them. And Elisha prayed, and said, Lord, I pray thee, open his eyes, that he may see. And the Lord opened the eyes of the young man; and he saw: and, behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire round about Elisha." (2 Kings 6:16-17)

It is difficult to see with our spiritual eyes and see the Heavenly protection. This type of faith is evidence of a much stronger faith.

This tree is growing and capable of giving fruit. It is strong and can withstand storms.

This faith can mature into faith that can accomplish the impossible.

I have just finished reading the Book of Joshua in the Old Testament. One of the stories stood out to me. Joshua is getting ready to take the Camp of Israel across the Jordan River and begin the campaign of taking the Promised Land.

The Levites carry the Arc of the Covenant right up to the water's edge. The river was swollen and fast. In chapter 3 we read, "And it shall come to pass, as soon as the soles of the feet of the priest that bear the ark of the Lord, the Lord of all the earth, shall rest in the waters of Jordan, that the waters of Jordan shall be cut off from the waters that come down from above; and they shall stand upon an heap." (vs 13)

The priests were required to get the soles of their feet wet before the water stopped and a path was cleared.

This is clearly impossible.

But it happened.

Another story of an impossible thing accomplished by faith is the story of Lazarus. Lazarus had been dead for four days before Jesus came to his sorrowing sisters. The institute manual tells of a tradition that the Jews had that the spirit lingered by the body for three days hoping to reenter it. After the third day, the spirit left, never to return. Perhaps the reason Jesus waited the four days related to this tradition. We don't really know. What we do know is that the decomposition process would have been well under way after four days. There was no refrigeration to slow the progress of decay.

It was impossible that Lazarus would revive and come out of the grave whole and healthy, and yet he did.

I believe that we live in a time where we might be required to have the faith to do impossible things. The tree of our faith might be required to withstand hurricanes.

May we have the faith of Nephi who said, "I will go, I will do. . ." (1 Nephi 3:7)

Nephi went and he got the plates. He went and built a boat. He went and crossed the ocean. He went and built a city and a temple and a people.

Isaiah writes a question from the Lord, "Is my hand shortened at all, that it cannot redeem? or have I no power to deliver?" (50:2)

On my mission, at every mission meeting, we would stand and recite a passage from Joseph Smith.

"The standard of truth has been erected; no unhallowed hand can stop the work from progressing, persecutions may rage, mobs may combine, armies may assemble, calumny may defame, but the truth of God will go forth boldly, nobly, and independent, till it has penetrated every continent, visited every clime, swept every country, and sounded in every ear, till the purposes of God shall be accomplished and the great Jehovah shall say the work is done." (Times and Seasons, 1 March 1842, quoted by Dallin H Oaks, April General Conference 1996)

"Those that be with us are more than those that be with them."

The war has been won.

We need to decide whose side we are on.

With God, we can do the impossible.

I'm getting released today

We are getting ready to move, again. I am ready. I feel there are people we need to meet, things we need to do.

This will be my last lesson to this Relief Society. I have been thinking what I want to say, and I have a pretty good lesson, at least I think so. (I'll post my lesson from today after I give it. It seems to work better that way.)

I have also been looking for the information I got when I received my calling. I have not been able to find it. It was not where I thought it was. It is the copy of the Handbook and a packet put together by the Stake Relief Society. 

The Handbook is on my scripture app.  I have really liked going electronic. 

I  searched all the places that I could find, and then I prayed. We had places to go yesterday, but our meetings don't start until 1pm. So I determined to look this morning.

Last night I had two places come to my mind. I looked there this morning. They were in the second place. I said a prayer of thanks, and then I looked at the stack that was with the two items I was looking for.

I found a 5 - 7 minute "story" that I had prepared two years ago for the Relief Society. I read it and knew I needed to keep it.

This has become my journal and the place I keep important things. This was my portion of the Christmas lesson that year. It was more my ponderings and not a story per se.

Christmas time is a time to remember the birth of Jesus. And yet the reason we remember His birth is because of how He lived His life.

I want to share two of my favorite New Testament stories.

I love the story of Christ sleeping in the middle of the storm. His disciples surrounded Him. They were terrified. They were men that made their living sailing on the Sea of Galilee. The disciples knew what to look for. They knew how to stay safe. An yet, on this occasion, they were caught in the middle of the sea in the middle of a storm. They were afraid for their lives and surprised to see Jesus sleeping peacefully in the tempest. (Matt 8:27).

I think there is a lesson in the routine of the voyage. The disciples were doing what they should have been doing. They were with who they should be with. The were in the routine of their lives, something they did countless times. And something they continued to do after this event. Still having done nothing wrong, they found themselves in a very troubling situation. The Savior was there in person, and it was natural, if a bit unnerving, to wake Him up and ask for help. After the winds ceased, the boat was still in the middle of the lake. There was still work to do, but the Heavenly Peace had blessed them, and saved them.

We can liken this story to us. In the middle of our trials, we can feel the peace and love from our Master and courageously continue. He has told us, "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." (John 14:27).

I think that it is during the storms in our lives that we listen the closest for the voice of the Lord. And our lives are designed to have many sudden and violent storms. We have only to look at the lives of the prophets, the friends of Christ, to see that trials come to even the most righteous.

The result of our trials, hopefully, lead us closer to Him. 

I love the scripture in John. Mary was alone in the garden by His tomb. She saw two angels and they asked her why she was weeping. She replied that she was looking for her Lord. She turned around and with eyes full of tears she didn't recognized the One she was seeking. She didn't recognize Him when He said, "Woman, shy weepest thou?: Whom seekest thou?" She didn't recognize Him until He called her name - "Mary." (John 20:11-16)

Thinking about this story this way makes me think of the parable of the Good Shepherd. The sheep will know His voice and they will come when He calls them - by their name.

We can be sure that Christ knows us. It is up to us to know Him. And that is Life Eternal - to know God and Jesus Christ. (John 17:3)

This Christmas season, let us remember the reason for the season. Let us be wise and seek Him. Let us come to know Him and follow Him home.

Testimonies

We have bee reading a little devotional book in the mornings. It's called He Shall Fulfill All His Promises by Lloyd K Newell. Thea gave the book to us for Christmas. 

Brother Newell uses quotes from the scriptures and the Brethren . One morning we read about the importance of bearing testimonies. It was during the time Craig was away for so long (40 days). 

I told the boys I was raising them to be missionaries and missionaries testified of the gospel and of Christ. So we needed to practice that. I said we could have a little testimony meeting in our home. 

They both have watched their friends bare testimony on Fast Sunday and endured their parents gentle (at least I hope it was gentle) teasing and encouragement. My boys are like I was when I was young. They are happy to sit in a meeting without speaking in the meeting. 

Last week when Craig was home, I brought it up again.  Choir practice got I the way, and we let it pass yet again. 

Today, I called the boys together before Church. (We have 1pm Church). Craig came out and I led off. I said a little bit about what the daily devotion was on, learning from adversity. I had just read the story of Joseph being sold into Egypt and reuniting with his family in the middle of the famine. I said that in the middle of my hardest times, that is when I knew that God knew my name. That is when I knew he heard me. That is when I heard his answer the clearest. 

Josh went next. He had been thinking about what he would say and just didn't know. Then Friday night was a youth baptism trip to the temple. He talked about how he could feel a difference immediately upon entering the temple. That feeling of being in a sacred place. The immediate reverence of a dedicated temple. (I can't remember his words exactly, so I'm using mine to give the feeling of what I remember he said.) 

The fact that my 13 year old boy took the time to ponder what he would say was worth the time and the awkwardness of the meeting. I am encouraged to do this again to encourage the thought process  and create the habit of testimony in our family. 

Boaz didn't know what to say, so Craig walked him through the basics. Boaz then said the basics, because it is in the baring of your testimony that you find it. Craig asked him how he knew it was true and. Boaz said because he felt good when we talk about the gospel. He acknowledged that was the Holy Ghost. Again, totally worth the effort. 

Craig finished up our family testimony meeting. He talked about those 40 days away from the family. He said he was surrounded by good people. They were doing good things, but he didn't have his family. He thought that is what the Terrestrial Kingdom would be like. It wasn't enough for him. There is a greater desire to do the needful things to boost him up to Celestial Kingdom. The sweetest part of life is time with family. 

I am grateful for the Gospel that teaches us to create these moments. I am grateful for my family and my life. 

This Sunday was certainly sweet. 

Asking the right question.

Thea went to a meeting where Elder Bednar spoke. She has told Craig about it and he told me a bit. 

He started out saying it was not "Stump the Apostle" but they could ask questions. I laughed. Craig said Thea enjoyed the interactive meeting. 

I was getting ready and started thinking what questions would I have for a member of The Twelve. I have been in a similar meeting, but have always been to quiet to ask. And honestly, have never really thought about a question that would be worthy to ask. No attempt to stump him, just a question worthy of his time.  One that I could not find in my own study. 

I had a question on my mission. I asked to speak with a member of the temple presidency and he gave me a very good answer. My question was - with a dad that had not been active my whole childhood and a mother who had left the Church, where did I belong? Did I have a choice which family I would be with forever?  My parents were, and are, divorced. His answer was that Jesus was smart enough and loved us all enough to make the call. I just had to trust in Him. 

That has been my answer for most of my tough questions. If I didn't know it, He did and I could trust Him. 

Then in a round about way and one I could not retrace, because I tend to think in dizzying circles, I came up with a question where that is not the answer. 

How do I forgive someone I don't really want to forgive?

I have read somewhere that forgiveness is a gift bestowed by Heaven. How do I pray for something I don't really want?  

And I was given the very simple answer.  I don't pray for something I don't want, I pray for something I do want. 

I want to be obedient.

I want to follow the commandments. 

I want to return to Him. 

So, today my prayer became, help me follow Christ and find forgiveness for those I am having a hard time forgiving. 

Forgiveness isn't about them or me. It is all about Him. 

Maybe I am growing up, finally. 

Winter blues

I've read a few blogs about winter blues. Winters are all about  surviving until the sun decides to come back. Growing up in Utah, I always thought that February was the coldest, hardest month. Even with it only being 28 days, still it drags by. 

Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years have come and gone. Although I like Valentine's Day, it just isn't enough to push the doldrums away for long. That and many times Valenine's Day is a day of loneliness for those who haven't found that special someone. 

This year Craig is one the road. His goal is to make it home in time to take me to a crab dinner. The map app tells him it is 12 hours and 28 minutes to get home. 

I am not working today. I have the sheets in the wash. The kids are at school. I have holes in the walls to fill, a quilt to start, shopping to do. 

I think about running, but it started to snow and the wind is hard to run in. I have lost the lungs a bit from when I was running daily. 

Yesterday I painted my toes. 

Today I have a hair appointment. I am thinking about going just a bit shorter, especially around the ears. The natural curl there tends to curl forward giving me a weird cowlick at ear level. 

Today taking Boaz to the bus today, and for the last week or so, it has been light enough to read the spelling words to quiz him. 

The sun is returning. 

The ground is thawing. 

It is warm and then snows again.

We need the moisture. 

Badly. 

My soul yearns for the sun and its warmth. 

I want to see life return to the earth: flowers, green grass, leaves budding on the trees. 

The promise of Spring teases me the month of February - all 28 days long. 

And I remember the promise of Spring, with its renewal of life, is a symbol of the promise of the return of the Son and the Life He offers. 

I must remember to yearn for Him as I long for Spring.